Mom’s No Peter Brady – A Birthday Eruption!

My mom is no Peter Brady.  There – I said it.  I know it hurts mom.  But when it comes to making a volcano that erupts, you still have work to do.  At the same time, we have to give you props for making the effort.  It’s better to make a non-erupting volcano, than no volcano at all … as the saying goes.

This past Saturday my daughter Olivia had her birthday party (she turns 9 on Wednesday).  She had a dinosaur-themed birthday party. There was little dinosaur decorations.  Dinosaurs on the cake.  A big inflatable dinosaur.  There were also fake mustaches for all the little girls to wear, naturally.

So with a dinosaur/mustache-themed birthday party, my mother decided to help kick the party up a notch by making a volcano.

Kids for years have channeled their inner-Peter Brady from the famous Brady Bunch and made a lava-erupting, oozing volcanos for school science projects. A thing that I love about my mom is that she always wants to make parties fun.  She always gets creative an add extra fun touches to family get-togethers.  Especially when it comes to her grand-children.

When watching our kids, she’s even thrown fun parties for the kids – like a Hawaiian-themed party or a Mexican fiesta. Sometimes mom’s ideas go over great; other times, not so much.  I remember when she snagged a still useable Dora the Explorer pinata out of her neighbor’s trash for Olivia’s 2nd birthday.  If you want to traumatize a 2-year-old girl, give kids a baseball bat and have them whack your child’s favorite cartoon character!

I usually laugh at my mom’s attempts. She usually does too.  You can hear my cackling in the video below.  My favorite parts – the little girls underwhelmed reaction to the volcano and my mom saying that this better not end up in one of my “cursed blogs”.Enjoy!

So my mom is no Peter Brady when it comes to volcanos.  That’s okay. Judging by the smile on Olivia’s face, I don’t think she cared. I’m thankful that she looks for attempts to make my life (and my kid’s life) fun.  I’m glad she tries.

Knowing my mom, she won’t stop trying.  And I won’t stop laughing … with her.

Far From the Worst …

For the third time this month, I’m on the road.  I started the month in California.  I then took a trip to Florida.  This week … Tahiti?  New Zealand? Kankakee?  Yes, Kankakee, Illinois … naturally.

Over the next few days I’ll be “pledge driving” for Shine.fm in Kankakee (well, technically Bourbonnais … but Kankakee is so much more fun to say).

I spent a decent chunk of my life in this area.  I went to school at Olivet Nazarene University in Bourbonnais.  I liked it so much, I spent 6 years there!  About a month into our marriage, Julie and I moved to Kankakee.  It was our first home and we lived there for about 3 years.  It was during that time Kankakee was deemed “the worst city in America”!  Although, I don’t think us living there factored into that?

I’m not sure how that was exactly determined?  I think the economy, crime, schools, etc played into it.  I wasn’t crazy about the town, but I don’t think it was the “worst city in America”?  I mean, I was frustrated that I couldn’t find a decent dry cleaner or place to get my haircut … but the worst … nah!  Did it have relatively high murder rate per capita?  Sure, but let’s not nitpick …

There’s the Kankakee River.  Some good hot dog places. Olivet Nazarene University is a beautiful campus.  And there is a buffet place called “Coyote Canyon”!  C’mon!  Wouldn’t you want to eat a steak from a place with “coyote” in it’s name?

David Letterman, at the time, actually had some fun with Kankakee being named the worst city in America to live.  He did a “Top Ten” list about the city, interviewed the Mayor and gave not one, but two gazebos to the city.  He said Kankakee could promote itself as “home of the world famous twin gazebos”.  I don’t think that slogan ever caught on.

It’s been over 10 years since I lived here.  I drove by my old house and the hospital my son was born in.  I went to the mall where I worked at in college (Camelot Music – selling CD’s … remember stores that sold CD’s?).  In many ways, the area hasn’t changed.  Coyote Canyon is still there (full disclosure – I’ve never ate there).  So is the river and hot dog places.

But in other ways it has changed.  It’s grown with new businesses that have popped up over the years.  New homes and new neighborhoods. The Chicago Bears now hold their summer training camp at Olivet (and the campus looks better than ever).

It has gotten better with age.  It’s bigger and nicer … and so far, I haven’t been murdered.

My Humble Beginnings (video)

It’s a common radio-folk joke to say, “I have a face for radio.”  Crazy, hilarious, I know and I’m sure I’ve said it.  But when I was a kid, I was all about being in front of the camera and making movies.

I think my dad may have bought one of the first “video” cameras.  It was this huge camera that probably weighed 20 pounds, which you actually had to attach to this “portable” VCR – if portable meant lugging around this 40 pound machine that had to be plugged in.  It didn’t matter … me and my friends spent many weekends and summer days in my parent’s basement making movies.

The earliest and some of the funniest (some of it is actually intentionally funny) were with my best friend Derek Miller.  We have several VHS tapes full of “Eric & Derek” movies.

If you ever wonder where my broadcast career truly began, check out this newscast from me and Derek (in the green shirt) circa 1981 when I was 10 years old.  We were very much influenced by Saturday Night Live, although Derek was more Chevy Chase and I, sadly, more Joe Piscopo.

My older brother Mark was working the camera on the tripod and also helping out behind the scenes (even though sometimes “behind the scenes” meant creeping on scene).

Watch and enjoy …

Field of Dreams

There are many times as a Dad where I missed the mark or didn’t get it right.  Not to brag, but I believe on Friday I got it right.

Side note:  Ever notice when someone says, “not to brag” they are about to brag?  It’s kind of like when people say, “I don’t mean to judge, but …” or “I’m not a racist, but …” or “I didn’t mean to use your toothbrush to clean the toilet, but …”

Anyway, back to my bragging (Don’t worry, you can brag about me later if you are worried about that) … on Friday, Evan celebrated his 11th birthday.  He originally didn’t want a party, but then days before his birthday he decided he wanted one.  It wouldn’t be a big deal, if birthday parties didn’t become such big deals!

Back in the day – it was friends, cake, presents and maybe a freaky clown that would give kids nightmares for years.  It was great and we liked it!  Now, they’ve become these elaborate events where you feel like you need pyrotechnics and a million dollar budget.

The only thing I can remember that was something beyond the normal for a birthday party when I was a kid is when me and my friends watched a bootlegged VHS copy of “Raiders of the Lost Ark” my Dad got from a friend.  Nothing is more heartwarming than a potential felony involved in your birthday.  Plus, I’m pretty sure we didn’t rewind the tape either.

Birthday parties somehow progressed to Chuck-E-Cheese (where a large rodent now scars children) to large events worthy of a professional party planner.   For my daughter’s 8th birthday, she had some traveling animal act come by the house.  It’s a long story, but the band Echoing Angels also came by the house and played for the kids.  I’m sure they’ll never forget the gig where they opened for Coyote Chris and his hedgehog at little girl’s birthday party.  They are pushing to be the headliner this year …

For Evan’s 10th birthday, we held it at an indoor water park.  They pretty much ignored all the slides and played basketball in the pool.  So this year, I said why don’t we just order pizza and you can play football in the backyard?  Well, in order to sell it I said I would throw him a “kick butt football party”.

It didn’t take amazing planning.  It wasn’t elaborate.  I took a few hours and 7 cans of spray paint to turn my backyard into a football field.  I have to say it looked pretty good – like a professional field, if a professional field had lots of weeds, dead grass and had to be pooper-scooped.

But Evan and his friends didn’t care – they loved it!  They literally played until they couldn’t see anymore.  One of his friends said it was the best birthday party he ever went to … they ate pizza and played football for 5 hours …  no clowns, no water park, no animal act, just pizza and play.

I was reminded that the best moments and memories, very rarely are attached to things that are expensive or elaborate.   Often times, it’s the simple things that show you love and care for them that have the biggest impact. I have a feeling he’ll remember this birthday – the day my dad made the backyard into football field – forever.

On Saturday, I looked into my backyard and saw a ripped apart lawn.  Julie reminded me that someday we’ll look back there and it will look beautiful and pristine and we’ll long for the days of boys happily playing on it and ripping it apart.

Evan at Eleven

I’m sitting here looking at my son play with some of his birthday presents.  Evan turned 11 today.

Eleven amazing years that have flown by.  I can remember 11 years and one day ago when Julie first started feeling contractions.  To pass the time until the contractions warranted going to the hospital, we went out to dinner.  Afterwards, we went to the mall – I needed to buy some shoes.  I remember thinking that I needed to buy these shoes tonight, because after having a child I could never justify buying something for myself again.  Sounds extreme, but in some ways it was accurate.

When you get married you have to adjust to life not just being about you.  Having a child takes it to a whole new level.  There’s that overwhelming feeling of having this little life that is completely dependent on you.

I heard someone the other day talking about the need to enjoy life before having kids, because once you do, you won’t be able to do anything for yourself until they graduate college and are on their own.  The implication is that it’s a bad thing.  But the majority of people who have kids, would say the joys outweigh any “inconvenience” of not being able to do what you want, when you want.

Any empty-nester will tell you to enjoy this time, because it does go fast.  There are days when it definitely doesn’t feel that way. But when I see how quickly these 11 years went, I get it.  In another 11 years, he’ll most likely be graduating from college and ready to start his “life”.  But when I even look at the years in between now and then, I realize how little time there is to soak this in.  He’ll be a teenager before you know it … driving and the freedom that comes with that … hanging with friends will become a lot more fun than hanging with mom and dad … and then off to college.

Sheesh!  I’ve managed to depress myself!

As I look at him, my heart just bursts with happiness.  He’s an amazing kid, who truly is one of a kind.  He’s tender-hearted, yet all boy.

He gets his great looks from his mother.  I’m sure his intelligence, too.  And he can talk (another trait he gets from his mom). I can remember one of his first report cards that was great, with the only “negative” being he tends to “socialize” a lot in class.

He gets his love of sports from me.  I love the fact we can watch and play sports together and how he seems to check espn.com every morning when he wakes up.

I love the way he loves his little sister Olivia and how the two of them are like best friends.  They genuinely like to play and laugh together.

I think the thing that I love the most about him is his zest for life.  He never does anything half way.  He soaks in every moment of every thing he does.  And everything he does, becomes an event.  As a toddler, it wasn’t enough for Julie to simply take him on a walk – he had to take snacks and supplies.  There’s no such thing as simple football game with his friends in the neighborhood.  You need to wear a jersey, have team names, keep stats and make brackets for a tournament.

He has taught me a lot. I want to live with that same kind of zest when it comes to being his dad.  To not parent half way.  And to soak in every moment.

When he was born, I remember saying, “Baby Evan, sent from Heaven.”  And it’s true.

Baby Evan, sent from Heaven is now eleven.  Happy Birthday Evan!  I’m proud to be your dad.

You are an amazing boy, that has made me a better man.

You Might Cut Your Feet Off

I once uttered, “Maybe getting a mini-van might not  be such a bad idea.”  I remember thinking – “What have I become?”  When did that become a good idea?  I vowed never to get a mini-van and now I was not only thinking about it, but verbalizing it.

It’s all about having kids, right?  When you become a parent you say all sorts of things you swore you’d never say …

“Don’t make me turn this car around”

“Because I said so, that’s why!”

“If everybody jumped off a cliff, would you?”

Then there are those things you never even imagined saying.  All sorts of bizarro things.

“Don’t write on your sister.”

“Get your butt off of his face.”

“Don’t stick cookies up your nose.”

God bless my son Evan.  He actually asked if he could mow the lawn tonight.  I know someday he’ll be a teenager and I will wish for him to ask me that!  But he’s ten now and it’s dangerous.  When I said he couldn’t do it by himself and he asked why, I replied “Because that’s how kids cut their feet off.”  Wow, I’m really a parent now!

How about you?  What’s come out of your mouth that you never thought you would say?

 

Selfishness: A Work in Progress

Was it Socrates or the band Whitesnake that said, “Here I go again on my own”?  It was Whitesnake, silly.  Socrates I think said, “I shot the sheriff, but I did not shoot the deputy”.  Anyway, the Whitesnake song crossed my mind because here I am again traveling by myself. Last week in California; this week in Florida.

There was a time when traveling for work didn’t bother me so much.  A little time to yourself can be nice, I admit.  And a trip like this – a conference at Disney World where I get so see a lot of old friends is cool too.   But I find myself not liking going away as much as I used too.  I start dreading them before I go.  I miss my family.

Missing your family when you are away from them, I know, is a normal thing.  But I seem to miss them more these days.  I don’t know if its because I miss out on spending time with them, missing ballgames, seeing their faces.  Or I realize how my kids are growing up so fast and I don’t want to miss a thing (Aerosmith lyrics, right?).  A different take, but accurate take ,could come down to being less selfish.

God really shook me up a couple of years ago.  I tell people I feel like He hunted me down and forced me to confront issues in my life.  Bottom line was that I wasn’t happy with the person I was becoming.  I wasn’t the husband or father I knew I should be, either.  And if you were to really break down most “issues” we have in life, generally it comes down to being selfish.

Now outwardly, I don’t know if you would have seen me as the stereotypical “selfish” person.  I wasn’t stingy.  I shared.  I was generous in most ways.  But when it came to my time, attention and support to my family, I could easily just check out.  I remember my wife once saying to me, “sometimes you’re here, but you’re not really here.”  My mind would be elsewhere.  Was it all the time?  No, but it was enough.

Looking back, it makes me sad.  At the same time, I’m thankful for the wake-up call and for the opportunity to change.  I’m still a work in progress and it can still be a struggle.

Last night my son Evan, asked if I could come tuck him and lay with him while he falls asleep.  I told him I’d be up in 10 minutes. Ten minutes turned into twenty.  By the time I reached his room he was fast asleep.  Julie said it might not have mattered, because he was asleep in 5 minutes.  But my heart sank a little.  Evan turns 11 next week and the fact that he still wants me to lay with him is pretty unique.  I also know those days are numbered.

My heart sank because I don’t want to be that guy again.  As I said, I’m a work in progress.  So with him sleeping, I went and laid down in his bed with him. I put my arm around him and kissed his head.  Tears welled up in my eyes, because I thought I couldn’t keep a stinkin’ promise to be in his room in 10 minutes.  I’m going out of town for 5 days and he wanted to spend time with me.  I felt like I blew it.

It was like my own modern day version of the song “Cats in the Cradle”.

I laid in his bed for a few minutes and I began to pray for him.  One of the things I prayed is that these issues I have; he won’t.  That he would be better than that.  And that I would be too.

My California Trip … By the Numbers

It’s almost 11pm here in the Pacific time zone – still technically Friday – although, for my body it feels like 2am.  Actually, after all the stuff I did today, my body feels like 3am … in the year 2051 when I’m 80-years-old.  Point is, I’m still getting my “Friday” blog in on Friday.

Here’s how my trip went to my old home in California …

1 – suitcase … filled with clothes, toiletries, screwdriver and microphone

1 – roll of duct tape I bought to fix multiple things

2 – pairs of earphones for my iPod.  Yes, I found my original pair tonight after I spent $34 on a pair at the airport

2 – trips to In-n-Out Burger

2 – bottles of ice-tea I bought at the gas station/convenience store on the corner near my house.  We always used to laugh at the random things they would sell there.  “Honey, I’m going up to Tower Market to buy some burritos and sweat pants.”  As I walking through today, I noticed I could also pick up a leopard print Snuggy or Ladie’s Capri pants.

3 – visits with friends I managed to squeeze in between working on the house

4 – amount of rooms I did some sort of painting in (including painting the inside of a closet … not a walk-in closet, just a regular closet.  My property manager said I needed to.  Who notices if a closet is painted?)

5 – number of times I muttered unmentionable things while I was painting the inside of a closet.

6 – bags of mulch for my backyard

6 – AM.  That’s when my flight leaves tomorrow morning … or roughly 7 hours from now.

7 – The amount of trips I took to Home Depot in the last 2 days.  I think I should get an honorary orange apron.

8 – sprinkler heads changed.  I actually was able to fix them!  If I only knew how easy it was to fix them when I actually lived in this home?!?

50 – the age of Marge, who works in the garden center of Home Depot.  I know this because she told me twice yesterday that it was her 50th birthday.  She also told me again today.  As much as I went there, we are now probably close enough for me buy her gift.  Perhaps some capri pants?

1495 – the amount of dollars I felt like I spent at Home Depot.  It’s actually my house number for my address.  A home I’m not sure when I’ll see again.

I hope our next renters enjoy the home as much as we did.  I especially hope they like the freshly painted closet.